quote of the night

"Excuse me."
~Beth "the birthday girl" Strickland, as she muscles her way front and center to be first off the line out of the PBR tent during the duo team challenge.

"Oooooh, that's a quote!'

Beth after hearing Heath say "She's athletic, but she's portly" in a conversation about his girlfriend, pig dog, around the campfire after the race.

"My baton is in my pants..."

Ryan, seemingly unprovoked at the campfire after having finished a 24 second keg stand. After this, a conversation ensued about who had wood at the time... Kuklis seemed very vocal in the conversation.

smyfit@mac.com wrote:"Excuse me."
~Beth "the birthday girl" Strickland, as she muscles her way front and center to be first off the line out of the PBR tent during the duo team challenge.

Since she didn't get to drink a second PBR, she had to resort to begging not to be passed on her second lap.

"Why aren't the guys getting wood?"
-attributed to Jaime, I believe...

"Don't call me Plunkett!"
--Keith, well post-kegstand, perhaps revealing a previously hidden source of animosity

"I lost some hair..."
--Heath, after stepping in the firepit

"I just want to be alone. I just want to be alone. Leave me alone. Please let me be alone."
--Ryan, lying in my neighbor's yard

"I thought my friends were troubled."
--My neighbor Dave, witnessing the carnage

"I'm wasted."
--Ryan, answering his cell phone after disappearing from the firepit, post-kegstand and 5-whiskey "shot"

"I was walking down the driveway and heard his phone ringing."
--Hans, reporting back to the group that Ryan had been found in the neighbor's yard

"Wow, I walked down the drive a while ago and never even saw him lying there."
--Scooter, on his investigative skills

"He's really heavy, plus he's closer to the bathroom here."
--"concerned" friends of Ryan, who were kind enough to carry him back to the house, but decided he'd be better off on the laundry room floor than the cushy guest bed downstairs

"Why is there a man asleep on our laundry room floor?"
--Natalie, 7 a.m. today

"No, I don't drink..."
-anyone wanna take a guess?

"Oh, Bill has some nice wood."
-overheard and unattributed

"Hey Brad, you want to watch how to drink this?"
--Plunkett, enjoying his cognac from the Team Race win

"My not DNFing tonight was my birthday gift to you."
--Ray, finishing his first race in three weeks

"Oh yeah, her sister has a rack."
--Ray, in response to Mary explaining that her sister's car can't transport bikes

"I don't drink."
--Evelyn, asking for her third Negro Modelo

"I'd love to be paired up with one of the goats."
--Tom, on next year's Team Race, before disappearing to the woods

"I've give you a new wheel if you get me a beer."
--Heath to Scooter, around the firepit where seats were a hot commodity

"Suck it up, Biatch!"
--Stacie, to multiple chair-seekers around the firepit

“This is the Race for People Who Don’t Race, not the Beer for People Who Can’t Drink”
--Selene, as Lockwood set a new record for slowest peeber chug

"I found the egg!!"
--Taylor, thinking he'd won a prize for presenting Bill with the goose egg he picked up along the course. (FYI: It's since been placed in another secret location.)

"I know. I peed myself."
--Heath, when informed that his pants were wet

"Keith, maybe you shouldn't drink beer AND ride your bike."
--Mrs. Plunkett, witnessing her son draped over his handlebar after the race

"I like to be held by my knees and my ankles."
--Kuklis, on his preferred method of kegstanding

"Hmmm, maybe that wasn't a good idea."
--Kuklis, moments after taking a hammer to his chainring.

"I think. I want. To vomit."
--Out-of-breath comment independently sputtered by Ryan, Kuklis, Selene, Heath, Scooter (am I missing anyone?) at the beer station during the reverse race.

"Just write down whatever. I forgot to start the watch"
--Bill, when asked to call out finish times for contestants in the race for people who don't race.

"There's no better way to end your birthday than to clean up after a 100 of your closest friends."
--Beth, commenting on the realities of hosting 5th Street Cross.

"No way, it's not like being electrocuted or anything. It's just a pulse."
--Bill, when asked if he was planning to turn off the goat fence for the miss-and-out race.

"I'd love to be paired up with one of the goats."
--Tom, on next year's Team Race, before disappearing to the woods

Just so we're clear - not just any goat will do!

Scooter: Kuklis, let me borrow your wheel so I can ride today.
Me: No, You will destroy it. I like this wheel
Scooter: Seriously, I'll be gentle. It will be fine
Me: No
Scooter: Come on....
Me: Fine, but you break it, you bought it

1 lap later at the PBR Stop

Scooter: Uhh, dude sorry
Me: For what? (looking down and noticing waffled wheel) What the #&^% is your problem??? You are a #$%# #$%^ing %^&($&#$@%er!!!!!!!
Scooter: Dude, totally wasn't my fault, I got caught in a rut and it just gave out, must have been poorly built